The Walk of Healing
The road You have taken me on has led
Down into the valley of the shadow
Where I feared much evil, but found none,
Save what I truly thought about myself.
I have climbed the mountain of pain
To the precipice of despair,
Death awaiting, threatening on each side.
The walk narrow
Between the cliff of self-pity,
With the rocks of depression below;
And the scree of the past
Offering a slippery slope backwards to where I began.
I have heard my own self echo off the canyon of truth
Vibrating throughout my reality.
Traversed the desert of self-sacrifice,
My thirst growing, my will dying;
Control being handed to God again and again.
Finding new life at oases of refreshing,
Yet beyond still, desert’s death in all directions.
I have seen myself in the pond of silence,
The water sometimes crystal clear:
Truth obvious to sight;
Sometimes ruffled by the wind of self-deception:
Truth distorted, the liquid indistinct, blurred.
I have walked the beach of companionship,
Jesus by my side and praise in my heart
Oneness a part of every stride.
I have wandered the plain of tears
Wondering where my Companion has gone,
Feeling the pain of the child uncried for many years.
Turned my back on my Companion
And walked the base of the volcano of anger
Smouldering with resentment.
Stumbled onto the circuit of forgiveness
A road that circles and crosses many others
And brings me back to myself.
I have circled the walls of self-preservation,
The brick work impenetrable even to me.
Crossed the drawbridge of self-revelation
Facing the truth of how I view myself and God.
Travelled to the plantation of the past
To discover the slavery to sins, lies and deception
Planted by the deceiver many years ago.
Hesitantly stepped the stones of self-disclosure
Constantly fearing the quicksand of rejection,
I have faced the enemy of confession:
Shame and fear burning deeply in my heart;
Only to realise my enemy was, in fact, a friend.
Meandering into the meadow of love and compassion
I have lain in the grass allowing
Your care to seep into me.
I have trodden the forest of solitude
Where You have pervaded my soul,
Transforming without sight with each footfall.
I have been drawn still further
Into the narrow trail of sorrow and sadness;
Thorns scratching through past emotions,
Exposing rejection and grief.
Plummeted into the abyss of hopelessness,
The darkness complete without and within.
Rowed the ocean of fear
In a dinghy swamped by the surging waves.
Immobile from the coldness of terror,
Holding to the ineffective oars of self-effort,
Waiting for the island of faith or trust to appear.
I have been stranded in No Man’s Land,
The battle between truth and lies
Raging around me.
Stopped at the inn of exhaustion
Too tired to continue;
Sitting amid neutrality
Seeking neither to feel nor to change;
Not wanting to face the road again.
Yet reprieve from travel, gifts energy,
So I have journeyed on at Your encouragement.
I have searched for the fountain of instant healing
That the rest of the road may be walked
Without pain or difficulty.
But healing has not been a destination.
The journey has brought a little more health
only one stride after another,
one landscape at a time.
Little by little the soul’s wounds receive care.
And always my Companion of the road
Beckons me forward;
New terrain awaiting our travelling feet,
Along the Walk of Healing.
By Jo Anastasiadis
Spiritual Growth Ministries - Volume 11, Number 2. Winter 2012.
Photo Credit: jenny downing via Compfight cc
